Blind Sight

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I’m Sonya, and I often have a problem acknowledging God‘s will as my own.

There, I said it. I’m not perfect. I fall short of His Glory daily, and this is not okay with me.

I think I’ll list my imperfections. You know, just for the few who may think I’m a bit self righteous in my posting.

1.   When I get angry enough, sometimes I curse… then I repent.

2.  If I’m stressed, I sometimes forget to pray, and I crave a shot of liquor, and if it’s bad enough and have a temporary loss of sanity and forget I’m saved, I might have it… then I repent.

3.  When I see a fine, handsome man, I don’t always wonder if he’s a Christian, I just start to have those lustful thoughts… then I repent

4.  I don’t get along with everybody and loving people who don’t love me back just gets under my skin… then I feel convicted, I repent, AND ask for a clean heart

5.  I sometimes take credit for my accomplishments and don’t give proper credit to God… so I repent

AND THIS IS TO BE EXPECTED!

Point is, I do a lot of repenting. I’m constantly asking God for forgiveness for something because I AM NOT PERFECT.  I can only strive for perfection.  Every single day of my life, I want to be a little better than I was the day before.  I used to think that God had all these unfair standards that he set for Christians that they could never live up to and I just couldn’t wrap my mind around how being under submission to His will was even POSSIBLE.  But I understand a little better now. Jesus gave His life for us because even though we sinned in so many ways, He still felt like we deserved a chance.  He knew that there were possibilities in us.  He knew that if we just took the time to understand Him, to get to know Him, then we would accept Him.  He wanted to save me, you, us, from eternal damnation so that He would be able to spend eternity WITH us.  He did all this while living an absolutely pristine, white as snow, pure and perfect life.  He created a standard of peace in the middle of a storm.  In the midst of being tempted, tortured, talked about, abused, scorned, lied on and hated, He never once sinned.

WOW

Do you understand just how amazing that is?  He dealt with so many more trials than me and He never once sinned.  When Jesus experienced hell on earth, He simply chose to tell His daddy about it.  He got closer to His Father.  He spent time in worship even when the “chips were down.”

We don’t experience even half of the adversity that Jesus did, but we (and I’m talking about me here) take matters into our own hands… and fail miserably.  Now I see it!  It’s not hard at all. I’ve just got to stay prepared for whatever happens next.  And the good thing about it all is, my Daddy has my back.

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5 responses »

  1. I totally love this post..because you are actually recognizing your faults. I’m new with my walk with Christ and people expect me not to mess up or to be perfect but truth is its not like that.

    • No dahlin. Some people, Christians especially, place these unfair expectations on us even though they know they can’t reach em. People tend to feel like they’ve “made it” and have all the answers and because they’re so knee deep in the scriptures, like they have the right to judge. And that is not right. Ever. Your job, the only thing you have to do, is your best. Follow the word of God in the example of Jesus. Sometimes you fall. It happens. Ask for forgiveness, and strive to do better next time. Stay prayed up. I’m proud of you!

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